Full Name: Matthew Graham Turland

Nicknames: Matt, "Spaghetti Man" (hate that one!), "Mr. Octopus"

Birthdate: March 11, 1982

Zodiac sign: Pisces

Hair color: Red (turning brown)

Eye Color: Brown

Height: 6" - 6'2"

Weight: 135-145 lbs.

Siblings & Their Ages: 1 brother, Joshua (10)

Location: Lafayette, Louisiana

School: Lafayette High School

Best Friends: Ben, Conrad, Chris, David, Rusty, Sean, Steven, Jessica, Sedera, Alesha, and all my other best friends whose names I failed to remember. You know I love y'all!

Person You Dislike The Most: My little brother ... he's a godd*** pain in the a**!!

Pets & Their Names: 1 dog, Yoshi (miniature dachshund)

Things you like to do in your spare time: Surf the Web; Design web sites; Computer Programming; Writing Fantasy and Sci-Fi stories, along with occassional fan fiction; Play Magic: The Gathering; Roleplay online; Playstation Games (FF7 Rulz!)

Things You Collect: The various ways in which people can insult me

Best Advice Ever Given: "Swear that you will, from this day on, never write anything that doesn't bring enjoyment or pleasure to yourself and everyone else. And, if someone doesn't like that, tell 'em they can shove it."

Words Or Phrases You Overuse: Stuff, Damn, several other four-letter words ... ;-)

A Non-Sport Game Which You Enjoy: Final Fantasy VII; Magic: The Gathering

Coolest Experience In Life: My entire biology class was talking while my teacher was giving us notes for finals, and you could tell she was about to let us study without the notes. I turned around and screamed 'stop' in Japanese and the whole class shut up and never got that loud again. The point: someone listened to me!!

Stupidest Thing You've Ever Done: I don't have that much stupidity or a free-enough life to do anything that stupid. That, and my lawyer advised me not to answer that question. ;-)

Fave Thing to Do Inside: Computer stuff ... what else?! ;-)

Fave Thing To Do Outside: I don't 'do' outside stuff. If I had to answer, it would probably be swimming in the pool in my backyard or riding my bike. Or definitely DRIVING!

Special Skills Or Talents: Computers, computers, and prose writing.

Character Traits You Look For In A Guy/Girl: intelligent; good personality; good sense of humor; understanding; optimistic; noble; romantic; accepting; and another dozen or so I can't think of. In any case, where am I gonna find a girl like this??

Future Job: Computer Programming for software or gaming company

Fave Music: Soft Rock (102.1 KQIS, 99.9 KTDY)

Fave Color: All shades of BLUE

Fave Food: Chocolate

Least Fave Food: Anything green

Fave Vacationing Spot: Anyplace not within the Louisiana boundaries; I don't get out much.

Fave Sport: Judo

Fave Group/Singer: LeAnn Rimes (that girl is FINE!!!)

Fave Book: The Neverending Story

Fave Cartoon Character: I don't watch cartoons anymore.

Fave Actor/Actress: Jean-Claude Van Damme, Eddie Murphy

Fave Movies: Superfights, The Quest, Bloodsport

Fave TV Show: Star Trek: Voyager

Fave Day: Any non-school day

Fave Month: March

Fave Holiday: Christmas

Fave Store: I don't shop.

First of all , how old are you? Um ... 25 ... okay, okay, 21 ... alright, you got me, 16.

Do you believe in reincarnation? I don't know ... maybe ... do you?

If you could be one animal what would it be? A cheetah, the fastest animal on earth.

If you could meet one person, who would it be? Kelly Antonie (and I wouldn't mind meeting LeAnn Rimes, either!)

Do you eat anchovies? HELL, NO!

Do you think of yourself as a "Greek God"? If I was in a fraternity, I might.

Which is the best invention: Post-Its or bread? Post-Its ... I'm just that kind of guy.

If you could go to one country, which would it be? England, Ireland, Scotland, or France, depending on my mood

If you could change one event in your lifetime which would it be? The election of Bill Clinton to President in 1992

If you could streak in front of someone's house, whose would it be? My lawyer has advised me not to answer this question. ;-)

Do you consider yourself to be the "Ding-Dong Daddy of the D-Car Line"? Never heard the song; therefore, don't understand the question.

If you had to get on a stag, would you rather, swing or ball room dance? Ball room; I can't swing for sh**.

If they were to build a statue of you, how tall would it be? 6'2"

If you could dye your hair what colour would you dye it? Brown, so I wouldn't have to wait on my natural color to change.

If you could live next door to anyone, who would it be? LeAnn Rimes; who else?!

Would you rather be deaf, blind or mute? None of the above.

If you found out your best friend was "happier than most", what would you do? As long they didn't "get happy" on me, nothing.

Do you consider yourself a good listener? Absolutely! I'm practically a psychiatrist.

Do you consider yourself a good talker? In terms of advice, absolutely!

Would you rather be short or tall? Shorter, so I could actually fit in doorways instead of having to duck. ;-)

Would you rather be Crazy and rich, or normal and poor? Normal and poor, as long as I stil had my computer

Would you say your looks are: good, ok, great, or "I walk around with a bag over my ead"? OK, I guess. Girls usually don't comment on that, so I wouldn't know.

Do you like to get "jiggy wit it"? Forgot what that expression means; I'm not fluent in Bad English, sorry.

Would you ask someone out the first time you saw them? Probably not; I've made the mistake of doing that several times.

Do you talk on the phone in excess to 3 hours a day? I don't think so; then again, I don't remember who I call or who calls me from one day to the next.

If an a random person on the street asked you fer an article of clothing, which would you give them? (socks and/or shoes don't count) My shirt; my muscles are good enough to show off. ;-)

Would you rather go on a walk your best boy friend or best girl friend? Girlfriend!

What is your dream honeymoon place? A nice resort in Hawaii.

Who do you think has it worse, girls or boys? Definitely girls, which is why I'm glad I'm a guy.

If you could be invisible for one day, what would you do? Probably whatever I do on a normal day, just to see how surprised everyone would be.

What is your favorite name brand shoe? I don't give a sh** about brand names.

If you could change your name, what would it be? My choice would probably change every week, so I dunno.

If you were in a theatre and the people next to you were making out, what would you do? Point it out to everyone in the theater, just to piss the make-outers off.

Have you ever thought you were going to die, from eating green jello? Not really. I can't remember the last time I ate jello, but if reincarnation really does that, then green jello might be the reason.

Whats the hardest thing about growing up? Changes.

Whats the weirdest thing you have done on a dare? Haven't been dared before.

Have you ever gone skinny dipping? My lawyer has advised me not to answer that question.

Would you eat a bowl of live crickets for $40,000? As long as I got some water right afterwards.

If you could do ANYTHING you wanted, what would it be? Live with Kelly Antonie on one side of my house and LeAnn Rimes on the other side.

Whats your worst fear? Dying by being involved in a plane/car crash or being shot/stabbed to death. That, and the possibility that vampires are real.

Whats the best trick you played on someone? Convinced my little brother he was a top-secret government robotics project, and that if he wasn't nice to me, I'd turn him into the government for a sh**load of money.

Do you sleep with stuffed animals? I haven't done that since I was four.

Have you ever felt you were in love? Plenty of times.

Do you want to fall in love? Love is a great feeling, so I'd like it to take me over again, yeah.

Do you eat lima beans? HELL, NO!

Do you like Clint Eastwood? He's OK.

Do you like to watch movies with Clint Eastwood in them? Not often.

Do you eat lima beans while watching movies? HELL NO!

Do you eat lima beans while watchin Clint Eastwood movies? NO!

Would you star in a movie with Clint Eastwood eating lima beans? Is there a pattern here?!

If you were stranded on a deserted island with one single person who would you want to be with you? LeAnn Rimes, who the hell else?!